I refuse to spend any time being miserable or feeling guilty after the fact. When I make mistakes, they're all about learning and growing. Instead of looking at my mistakes as character flaws, I look at them as opportunities for change.
There's more, though. In the past, I looked at other people's mistakes as something I needed to help them change. Now, with Lupus, I'm so busy trying to heal myself that I really don't have the time to worry about what everyone else is doing, even those that I hold dear. While that may sound selfish or inattentive, it's actually a very healthy thing for both me and them.
Not only does this put the responsibility for other people's growth in their own hands and show them that I respect their choices, it puts the responsibility for my own life in mine, right where it belongs.
I am an adult. As such, I am perfectly capable of recognizing my own mistakes and making changes where I see fit. That's my responsibility. It should be in my hands. Don't be embarrassed by my mistakes. They are not yours. They are mine to own and make amends for. You have nothing to be embarrassed about.
By placing the responsibility for my mistakes in my own hands, you are also more free to work on your own life and personal priorities.
Your mistakes are not my business. They are yours to own and manage. I embrace you just as you are. Your personal growth is your personal business.
I am not here to judge you or reprimand you, just as you are not here to judge me. I am not embarrassed by your mistakes because I recognize that you are human too and we humans are a work in progress. Progress must be made in our own time, on our own paths, by our own choice in order to be effective.
So, to put it bluntly, by making me prioritize my own time, Lupus has basically taught me to mind my own business and leave others to do the same while providing the strength, support and acceptance they need in order to do so.