by Lyn Lomasi, Write W.A.V.E. Media Staff

Ever see a product that rubs you the wrong way, but then you realize it's useful in some instances? Behold, the cat washing mesh bag. I know what you're thinking because I was thinking it, too. What the hell?

CONTINUE READING BELOW

What kind of sick, demonic person would torture their cat like this, right? I totally agree with that question in most instances. As a pet advocate, this is NOT something I would recommend using on a regular basis.

Like, could you imagine what hell you would have to go through to even get your cat in this thing? And then, what horror your cat must experience while you are using this to bathe him or her... oy!

This thing is so creepy, but a smart invention, nonetheless. Why? I can see it being useful on that rare occasion that your cat wanders off and gets covered in car oil or some other poisonous substance.

Rather than have your poor kitty get deathly ill, you may have no choice but to use this mechanism to keep him or her still while you douse them in that dreaded substance called water (shudders).

So, there you have it, the first edition of creepy, but smart products found on the internet.

Would you use this contraption to wash your kitty? Let us know in a comment below.

* Note: This pet mommy  & grandmommy who is a strict positive pet parenting advocate only recommends this product under extreme circumstances and does not advocate regular use, unless absolutely necessary.

by Lyn Lomasi, Write W.A.V.E. Media Staff

A friend posts something they experience on Facebook and everyone jumps in tossing down their two cent blows like a boxing match. But do you truly know how this other person feels on the inside or what they have gone through? The answer will always be no and if you think it's anything different, you have some learning to do about life.

What most people fail to realize is that each person is unique in how they feel physically, mentally, emotionally, and so on. This is largely based upon the fact that everyone's lives (what they've gone through) and physical limitations (or lack thereof) vary extremely from one person to the next.

Even if you've experienced similar things with someone, you're not that person. You may be able to listen, empathize, and even share experiences. However, don't presume that just because you have a similar experience, that experience or the attached feelings and effects are always the same. 

Say a gay man is feeling down about the way a friend has treated him since he came out. If you're a gay man or a lesbian woman (or in any other group people may mistreat), you may be able to sympathize with this man, comfort him, or share experiences.

However, you should never assume what he feels or how he should react because you don't know what he's been through or how he feels on the inside. Some people may be able to just shake it off and move on. If that works for them, awesome. But it may not work for another person, for whatever reason. Don't assume they're being difficult or they need to get over it.

Listen and learn why this made them so upset. Maybe the person ridiculing them is the one who needs to learn something. Again, it's more about each unique person than it is about how you dealt with your own situation. Your story may help but the way you deal with things is only one way and may not work for everyone.

When I was pregnant with my 4th child, it was very risky and after a certain point, I was ordered to be on bed rest for the remainder of that pregnancy. Someone actually told me that it wasn't hard to be pregnant and I should get my lazy ass back to work and suck it up.

Thing is, that person not only had no right to judge, but they also had no clue how hard I was struggling on the inside about not being able to work or how hard it was for me to do anything at all. I had three prior pregnancies and two of those were fairly easy. My body would not let me work this time and neither would my doctor.

It took all my strength to walk my kids to school and then later even more to homeschool them, due to problems with the school being behind in academics. Even with taking it as easy as possible, my son was born early at only 34 and a half weeks gestation, with his umbilical cord wrapped around his neck.

Prior to the birth, I had true false labor more than once, as well as issues with severe pain (I have a high pain tolerance, so it was bad), severe morning sickness, and so on. I also have a heart condition, fatigue, a digestive condition, and three nerve conditions. All of them affect me more severely than usual during pregnancy.

My son turned out fine. However, can you imagine if I had let that judging person influence what I did? He may not be here today or may have been affected severely and possibly I could have been as well. Just because you have been pregnant before doesn't mean you know everything about everyone else's pregnancy.

All bodies react differently. Think before you speak and make sure you're mindful of what others may be experiencing. Sharing pregnancy stories is fun, but telling others how to live their lives based on yours is wrong.

Before you judge how other people are feeling, remember that no one truly knows what others feel or experience unless they're that person. The next time you're talking to someone about anything that is serious to them, remember that even if you've been "there", you truly haven't. Once you realize that, it will be much easier to get along with people.

Listen, but don't judge. Empathize, but don't assume. Share, but don't ridicule. Learn, but don't apply the material to all others with the same situation or label. We're all different but we can all help each other grow by being more understanding.

Oftentimes when people make the choice to become a babysitter or nanny, their friends will prompt them to get a "real" job. However, babysitting and nannying are real jobs with a real paycheck. In fact, a person can make decent money in this position if they know what they are doing. As a mother with experience in babysitting, nannying, and many other jobs, I can tell you firsthand that watching children is indeed a job, and a hard one at that.

Babysitting Isn’t a Real Job?

While browsing internet forums, I was surprised to see how many people think that caring for children is not a real

job. In one babysitting forum, a babysitter was frustrated, due to friends nagging her to get a "real" job. Her friends portrayed her as someone who just plopped the kids in front of the television and called it a day, which was not what she did at all. She didn't feel she should have to explain herself, as she knew that is not what she did. Other babysitters began to agree and posted about similar experiences.

Babysitters Shouldn’t Get Paid Much?

In another online forum, there were people discussing why they thought babysitters shouldn't get paid very much. I was appalled to see that there were parents posting about babysitters not being worth much. In my mind, I tried to rationalize how a parent could believe this. If anyone should understand the value of a sitter, surely it would be the parents of the children. Unfortunately, there were only a couple parents in this forum who valued a babysitter. Most of the posters were parents, which saddened me.

Appreciate the Job of a Babysitter

A person who cares for children that are not their own should be appreciated, if not honored. This person is doing duties that the parent would normally be responsible for doing. Many sitters go above and beyond what they are requested to do, simply because they gain love for the children over time and enjoy doing things for them, as well as spending time with them. Sitters are required to change diapers, prepare meals, clean up messes, organize activities, entertain the children, prepare the children for naptime or bedtime, and much more. No, a parent would not be paid to do these duties, but that's because they are the parent. They chose to have and raise this child. The sitter did not make your child, so these are duties that will need to be paid for and appreciated.

Double Standards About Babysitting Jobs

Parents should automatically know how hard it is to do these duties. So, how fair is it to pay someone else to do duties that you know are hard and then look down on them and not appreciate them because they are doing something you cannot be there to do at the time? That seems like a double standard to me. If you trusted this person enough to watch your children, you must have seen something special about the person. Otherwise, why would you hire them to watch your children?

Babysitting is Definitely a Real Job

Babysitting and nannying are jobs. They are hard jobs. Take that from a person who has slaved away in retail for a minuscule check, as well as done other jobs requiring vigorous labor and hard work. I've also been a nanny or babysitter in the past. Watching children is still harder than any "real" job I've ever had. Appreciate your babysitter, if you don't already.

*I originally published a version of this via Yahoo Contributor Network

As infants, when an adult would chime in with these "words" or sound effects, my children would simply give them a confused look as if to say "What is wrong with that person?" I'm glad most of them didn't notice as many feelings could have been hurt. Most people I was close with knew my rule, but I generally didn't say anything to people who would only see the baby every once in a while, so as not to hurt feelings or turn it into a controversy or heated discussion.

Yes, children need to be children, but they also need to learn. As parents, it is our job to teach them everything they need to know to succeed in the world. Could this baby talk be a reason for some children taking speech classes? It is likely not a cause for every case, but surely it could be a cause for some of them. If babies hear words incorrectly, they will inevitably speak them wrong as well. After all, if they don't hear the correct word often enough, what else would they think? They will, of course, go with the option spoken to and around them the most often.

Cut the baby talk already! Your child’s intellect is suffering.

*I originally published this in 2007 via Yahoo Contributor Network

by Lyn Lomasi, Staff Writer

Since the day I was born, eight has ruled my world. How would I know if I was just a baby? Well, I was born on the 8th day of my birth month, for starters. Perhaps that’s where it began and perhaps it actually began much before then. Every time I turn around, the number 8 is popping up in some way.

One of the most important representations of 8 in my life involves my children. All of my girls have an 8 in their birth dates as well. This is significant, considering that none of my children were delivered “on time” and yet the girls all ended up with the 8s. One of my best friends (San over at Informed Sharing) also happens to be connected to the number 8, which doesn’t surprise me.

I’m a studier of many things, a believer in few where religions are concerned, and a seeker of truth above all. I don’t belong to any religion and often say love is my religion. However, I do like to study many of them. One of my favorite Goddesses to study is Durga, who has 108 names and is often depicted as having anywhere from 8 – 18 arms. She’s known as real, a protector, victorious, invincible, powerful, intelligent, gorgeous, mother of all, fierce, and many other things I can relate to.

The number 8 also holds strong meaning within the law of Karma, which is another study interest of mine. In numerology, the number 8 represents strength in business and finance. However, it also represents balance, wisdom, organization, leadership, efficiency, and practicality. This number is an equalizer, which makes a great deal of sense as it pertains to me. I am very strongly involved in advocating for equality.

Egyptian mythology is another interest area of mine. Ancient Egyptians considered the number 8 to represent balance and cosmic order. I’m not sure if I contain the power to balance the entire universe. Perhaps, in some way, we all do. But I am often a middleman in many situations. For Yogis, the lotus flower has 8 petals and the center of the lotus represents the axis of the Earth.

I have literally spent days on end looking up symbolism behind the number 8. Some of it I relate to and some I don’t, as many are representative of religions I don’t subscribe to. However, it is certainly interesting to research and see what does relate to me.

The main point is that 8 surrounds me and rules my world. What number, if any, rules your world?

*I originally published this on Bubblews.com

by Lyn Lomasi, Staff Writer

I have a serious addiction and I like the way it burns on the way in and during the rush. Before you get scared, I’m talking about heat – you know, the kind you add to food. What the heck did you think I meant? I like my spicy and I like it HOT!!

When I say hot, I mean like inferno-type hot. I’m that person who will make her salsa from ghost peppers and use that as dip for chips – and not even flinch just a little doing so. Peppers go with every meal -- on the side and in it (if the others eating it can take it).

I’m so addicted to heat that fiery and sunny is just part of who I am. I’m that super-happy person whose always spreading positive messages and making others smile. I’ll help anyone in a heartbeat. But like a true pepper, my sarcasm will hit you just at that moment that you thought I was mild – unless you mess with my kids or family. Then, I’m another kind of fire.

Anyhow, if you eat something I prepare, you better tell me in advance if you want mild because my food is anything but. However, there’s plenty who will line up to tell you that it’s a must. I’m not allowed to come to certain get-togethers without at least one of my spicy dishes.

Cayenne, habanero, and ghost are three of my favorite peppers. You’ll rarely see me eat anything but desserts or fruits without them. I even lace my salad with my heat addiction. What? I see how you’re looking at me. But that won’t stop me. It’s darn good. Go ahead and try it.

I love the way it burns when I eat spicy food. How about you?

*I originally published this on Bubblews.com

I’ve always been quite the daredevil, even when I was a small child, so one would think that a story about a rollercoaster wouldn’t be so “different” for me. It’s not the rollercoaster itself which makes this particular childhood memory different than most that you hear.

When I was very young (maybe three or four), I was riding in the car with my parents.  I was in the back seat and they in the front. My mom had talked about a rollercoaster and I pictured it in my head and said “Mommy, that looks like a cool ride! I want to go on it!”

I didn’t understand at the time why my mom seemed a little bewildered when she informed me that it didn’t exist so she’d have to find me another cool one. And my poor dad was the most confused of all.

As I got older, my mom retold the events of that day and I finally understood. She had never actually discussed this ride out loud. She was thinking about it and inventing it in her head at the moment that I told her I wanted to go on it. She never said a word about it out loud. I only thought she did.

*Photo Credit: Lyn Lomasi (two of my kids playing)

**I originally published this on Bubblews.com (no longer published there)

by Lyn Lomasi, Write W.A.V.E. Media Staff

I’ve made many mistakes in my life, even recently. I can be a hazard to myself at times. When screwed up things happen, there’s no one to blame but me. Shouldn’t I be depressed by now that I’ve let myself get into some of the things I have? No way! I like it. Uh, let me explain.

Mistakes are how we learn. I sometimes stumble so hard that when I fall you can hear an echo on the way down. But don’t we all? Isn’t that a part of life? Some days I want to say “Don’t Let Me Get Me” like the P!nk song says (embedded below). But in the end, just like her, I’m going to be me anyway.

I want to fall sometimes because every time I do, when I get back up, I’m so much stronger and wiser for it. Is this a license to misbehave? It may seem that way in some cases, but of course I don’t intentionally mean to do anything to hurt anyone else or myself. I’m just learning and growing like the best of them.

Sometimes I screw up so miserably I just want to crawl into a corner or under my comfy purple blankie to shield myself from the blows. But I’m not going to. I’m going to keep taking risks. I’m going to be a hazard to myself at times and I like it that way.

I’m learning. I’m growing. I’m real and I’m raw and I’m me -- and that’s all I ever want to be.

And I’m betting many of my friends are also hazards to themselves. Aren’t we all at some point?

Recently, the subject of cursing has come up often in my circle of friends. One common issue is that some women who curse are often made to feel guilty and told it isn't ladylike. This is not the case with just cursing. It goes even further into many other things.

To that I say "F**k someone else's definition of ladylike".

If you are a lady (or identify as one), you should make your own definition of what ladylike means to you, personally. You and only you can and should determine what your own values are. Like everything else, what ladylike means is going to be very subjective, depending on who you talk to. Why cater to someone else's belief of what it is? This is YOUR life. Ladylike should mean to you whatever it means to YOU.

As for me, yes, I say “the f word” and I say it often. In fact, it's my favorite word. Am I a lady? Last time I checked, I have all the correct parts, so I would say so. I do try to be conscious of what I say around certain people and in certain situations. But again, that's just me. What YOU choose to define as "ladylike" is up to you and you alone.

What is your definition of ladylike? Do you share my favorite word? Do you think there should be a universal definition of ladylike? Tell us in the comment section.

*I originally published a version of this on Bubblews.com (no longer published there).

The English language is a diverse one with so many words to choose from. So, why of all these words do I choose a word such as f**k as my favorite word? I'm a writer. Shouldn't I know more words or choose something more creative?

You tell me what word is more creative than f**k. I dare you. What other word can you stick anywhere and have it fit in perfectly? It colors any sentence, adds more meaning wherever it is placed, and honestly, it's simply fun to use.

Pick any other word and try to fill it in where I've filled in f**k (or f**king) in the following sentences and I can guarantee you it will sound extremely awkward, unlike my f**k word, which sounds perfectly normal anywhere.

I f**ing love posting my f**king writing on this f**king site. It's the most f**ing awesome f**ing thing since f**ing sliced bread.

Now try to place any other so-called creative word there in place of f**ing and see just how colorful it becomes. Not so colorful anymore,is it?

Yes, I am a writer who creatively chooses f**k as my favorite word and is darn proud of it.

Besides, as HarryWiddifield says, cursing is one of our given rights. It's just language, which we have the right to use.

I dare you to show me a more creative and colorful word in the English language.

Do you share my favorite word? Do you think my creative word is not so creative? Tell us in the comment section.

*I originally published this on Bubblews.com (no longer published there).

"Creating the perfect community isn’t about training everyone to act the same. It’s about pulling them all together and using each individual’s unique skills to create the perfect team." ~ Lyn Lomasi; Mouthy Momtrepreneur