by Lyn Lomasi, Write W.A.V.E. Media Staff

Welcoming a new baby can bring out various emotions in the family. Preparing a toddler for a new arrival in the family can be both a wonderful and a stressful time. There are many ways to help your toddler prepare and feel a smooth transition into the idea of having a new baby around the house and many can start during the pregnancy.

Avoid Jealousy

Some toddlers may become jealous of a new baby brother or sister. One way to avoid jealousy is to involve the toddler in shopping for the baby. A toddler can also help to prepare the nursery area. You may choose to let the toddler pick out fabric to prepare the new baby's wrap or nursery bedding. You could also consider allowing the toddler to pick a special stuffed animal or other decorative item to be on display in the baby's room.

Teaching Involvement Through Experience

Another way to prepare and involve a toddler is to teach him or her about babies while the baby is still in the womb. Allowing the toddler to feel the baby move can be helpful in this area as can reading him or her books about babies. Taking the toddler to a daycare, a friend or a relative's house or other location where they can see a baby up close may allow the toddler to prepare for and understand what exactly a baby is. Allowing the child to attend prenatal appointments and see the baby through ultrasound/sonogram as well as hear the heartbeat can also give the toddler a sense of the baby's existence.

Help Ease Resentment

Anger or resentment is another issue toddlers can experience when there is a new baby introduced to the family. One way to help avoid this is to start any changes related to the toddler in regards to the baby before the toddler even knows about the baby coming. For instance, switching the toddler to a bigger bed in order to reserve and prepare the crib for the baby can cause resentment toward the baby in some children. A possible way to avoid this could be to make the new bed transition before making the announcement of the baby and making the bed transition more of an accomplishment of the toddler rather than an adjustment made to prepare for the new baby.

Another situation that could cause resentment is the fact that some toddlers may think the new baby will take all of the attention and love from the parents. If a toddler is used to being the center of attention, the announcement of a new baby may worry him or her and cause thoughts that he or she will be pushed aside to make room for the new baby. Explaining that families have enough love for everyone may help ease the child's mind in this situation.

There are various ways to help a toddler prepare and get used to the idea of having a new baby brother or sister in the house. Each family and situation will be unique. Therefore, catering your welcoming methods to your toddler's individual needs may be the best way of all to prepare him or her for the changes that lie ahead.

*I originally published a version of this via Yahoo Contributor Network

by Lyn Lomasi, Write W.A.V.E. Media Staff

As a seasoned parent, I have tried my fair share of chore charts, rewards, and punishments when it comes to chores. Some worked for a short period of time and some were a failure from the start. Only one has stood the test of time with both young kids and even tweens. This is when we use a chore tracking system that includes rewards of both money and computer time. It requires a list of chores and a tracking chart.  With this method, it’s been possible to get tweens to do chores using allowance and computer time. The tweens are open to this, as are the younger kids. Here’s how it’s done.

Step 1: Create a chore list. This can be on a small sheet of paper that will be tacked to the refrigerator or another common area. List all chores throughout the entire house, big or small. I find it easy to sort the chores by rooms. This helps the kids find them and it also separates simple and hard tasks. For instance, taking out office trash may be simpler than taking out kitchen trash.

Step 2: Assign points to each chore. In our house, each point is equal to either a penny or 30 seconds of computer time. Determine how many points should be awarded for each chore, based on its difficulty. For instance, doing the dishes might be worth 50 points (variable). That would be 25 minutes of computer time or 50 cents. But a more simple chore, like washing the counters, might only be worth 15-20 points, depending on how dirty the counters may be.

Step 3: Determine when the reward will occur. We allow the computer time to be redeemed any time there is no schoolwork or housework that needs doing. But if the tweens choose money, they can redeem their points for money once per week. This teaches the value of saving because they have to wait and there is only so much computer time one could want. We also limit computer time to a certain number of minutes per day per kid.

Step 4: Create a tracking chart. This is separate from the chore list. The tracking sheet will be easiest to use if it can be erased and reused each week. We like to use a dry erase board and markers. We write in each child's name and when they do each chore, the points are placed with their name. The kids are allowed to choose any chores they please. You may decide to do this differently. If any points are rewarded before the end of the week (computer points), those are eased. This way, at the end of the week, the tweens are not confused as to how many points they should have.  

Step 5: Discuss the chart with your tweens. Let them know the basic rules, as well as how many chores (if any) are expected each day. We are more free with this and I think that opens them up to offer more than they might normally do if forced. Because they have an incentive, it's usually not necessary to ask them to do certain things. They already know that if they don't do any chores, they don't get any allowance or computer time because there won't be any points.

Each parent who uses this method may choose to add their own rules or modify the system to fit their family. It is not important to stick to my exact method because each child is different. Consistency is the most important factor of this chore rewards system, as with any other. No matter the method you choose to use with your tweens, be sure it is the right fit in your family and one you can follow through with. Consistency and follow-through are the secrets to success in anything.

by Lyn Lomasi, Write W.A.V.E. Media Staff

normally fills the mop bucket, have him mop the floors as well. The goal is to expand on current tasks and add on new ones as needed. This helps encourage independence at a pace your child can handle.

Give tweens full responsibility for any pets they have. Your tween may already have small pet-related tasks, such as feeding them, cleaning food dishes, playing with them, etc. But try slowly adding on more tasks as can be handled until the pet's full responsibility is up to your tween child. For instance, a 7-year-old may play with her hamster, feed her, and give her small treats as necessary. As she can handle it throughout the months and years, cage changing and cleaning and other tasks can be added.

Start teaching tweens to babysit with 'mommy's helper' tasks. Depending on your tween's age and maturity, being what's called a mommy's helper can aid in teaching independence. A mommy's helper is a babysitter or nanny that tends to the younger kids while the responsible adult is still present. Basically, this tween will be responsible for entertaining siblings and preparing simple snacks and meals. It's similar to babysitting, except that there is a responsible adult around to handle the more serious tasks. A mommy's helper usually busies the younger kids while mom works, cleans, or handles other household duties.

Enroll your tween in a sport or extracurricular activity. It's true that being involved in sports and activities teaches kids teamwork. But it also teaches independence. They have to learn to do things without you there to help. While you may be sitting on the sidelines at a game, it is up your tween to take action. It's especially helpful if your tween becomes team captain or gets to lead one or more classes with activity instruction.

Be independent yourself. If your tween sees you depending on others to get things done, that's the example that will be followed. But if you show that you can do things with or without the assistance of others, that can go a very long way. Because I work from home without a boss, my kids have seen me be very independent from the start. Even when I held more traditional jobs, I've always been a do-it-yourselfer. Whether you think so or not, the things you say and do are going to rub off on your kids.

Don't be afraid to let go. Some of the resistance to independence tweens can feel may be due in part to your own resistance. If you can't let go of the security blanket, then neither will your tween. Being free to do things and make decisions on their own prepares tweens for life. While you can't completely let go at this stage, it's important to ease up on controlling the things they can handle on their own.

by Lyn Lomasi, Write W.A.V.E. Media Staff

new ball game full of new discoveries, milestones, and successes and failures. If you pay attention to your tween, you'll be prepared to beat that teen attitude with a smile. Believe me, your effort will be much appreciated.

Letting go is hard, but necessary. Teens need much more space than younger kids. Not only are they likely going through an emotional roller coaster. But being independent is a big part of growing into the adult stage. When your tween starts to become a teen, it's the perfect time to prepare yourself by letting go of certain things. Let your tween make certain choices in preparation for becoming a teen. You can't (and shouldn't) control everything.

You're still in charge, but in a different way. Now, just because you will let go of some things when your tween becomes a teen, it doesn't necessarily mean you aren't the boss. You still have the final word and your tween should know this. However, your tween needs to also feel secure in making some decisions without your help. This will become even more necessary once your tween matures into the teenage years. Just choose your time together wisely and pick your battles.

Take it one step at a time. It's not going to be easy letting go of your baby or realizing that baby is getting closer to becoming an adult. Just relax and take things as they come. Ease yourself into the process by slowly giving up things within reason. Talk to parents who have been down that road before. Your tween is likely going to be acting differently than a few years ago. There will be new interests, new friends, more mature looks, and possibly a new attitude. It's all a natural part of life, as hard as it may be to watch unfold. For every difficult moment, there will be many happy ones. Always remember that.

Find different activities to share. Just because your tween is turning into a teenager, it doesn't mean you can't still have fun together. But your tween's idea of fun may be entirely different than before. Listen your growing child's opinions and choices and let them be heard. Savor the memories from your prior family destinations and activities. Then, make new ones to treasure that go along with your growing teen's needs. Trips to the mall may start to involve movie play dates and makeovers instead of the kiddie play area and ice cream cones. Find out those new things your tween is into and learn how to make them work for you both. Who cares if you don't like the latest band? Take your tween to that concert or buy the music anyway.

by Lyn Lomasi, Write W.A.V.E. Media Staff

"Mommy, Mommy! My arms are itchy!" Your toddler is standing below you tugging at your pant leg with persistence. You look at her arms and discover she has some sort of rash. To avoid risky scenarios as much as possible, parents can learn more about common houseplants that are poisonous. Here are some of the most common poisonous houseplants to keep away from kids.

Amaryllis

An amaryllis is a bulbous herbal houseplant. The flowers are funnel-shaped and vary in color. The poisonous part of the amaryllis is the bulb. If ingested, it can cause nausea, vomiting, diarrhea and salivation. Children may be attracted to the amaryllis for its stunning color and shape.

Azalea

The azalea is a flowering shrub with round clumps of blooms. They can be white, pink or yellow in color. They bear two types of leaves. All parts of the azalea are poisonous. When ingested, these houseplants can cause salivation, loss of energy, depression, nausea, paralysis in the arms and legs, coma, breathing difficulties, weakness and more. These flowers are bright in color and have a unique shape.

Caladium

The caladium has heart-shaped leaves and can be green, red, orange or white, depending on the species. Some other names for caladium houseplants include mother-in-law plant, heart-of-Jesus, caladio, cananga and angel wings. All parts of the caladium are poisonous when ingested. The caladium causes major irritation to the lips, mouth and throat.

Calla Lily

The calla lily is a houseplant with long stems or stalks and leaves shaped like arrows. They bloom in white or green. The leaves are the poisonous portion of calla lily houseplants. Irritations to the skin can occur on contact. Ingestion causes an extreme burning feeling to the lips and mouth. While toxic, the calla lily is often considered a very beautiful flowering houseplant. Thus, children may naturally be attracted to its beauty.

Cyclamen

The cyclamen can be both rounded and heart shaped. This houseplant has flowers which come in red, pink or white. The roots are the poisonous area of cyclamen houseplants. Ingestion can cause nausea, diarrhea, vomiting, paralysis and convulsions. Skin irritation from contact may also occur. Children may be attracted to the delicate size, vibrant colors or unique shape.

Dumb Cane

Also commonly called dieffenbachia, the dumb cane is a tall leafy plant. The leaves are large and can have ivory colored patches. The poisonous part of the dumb cane is the leaf. If chewed on, the leaf will cause intense pain and cause the mouth to swell. Children may be drawn to this poisonous houseplant because of the design on the leaves or the fact that the leaves are big and easy to grab.

Eucalyptus

Eucalyptus plants belong to the evergreen family. The leaves are rounded and can be a dark green or red tone. The leaves and bark of the eucalyptus tree are poisonous. Contact skin irritation can occur. Also, ingestion can cause nausea, vomiting, diarrhea and coma. The oil from a eucalyptus tree is toxic.

Jerusalem Cherry

The Jerusalem cherry or coral can be in the form of shrubs or herbs. These houseplants are often spiny or hairy. Black, orange or red berries grow from this plant. The entire plant is poisonous if ingested. However, the berries are the most potent. When ingested, the Jerusalem cherry causes throat irritation, fever, diarrhea and gastric irritation. Children may be attracted to this poisonous houseplant because of its colorful berries. To children, they may resemble edible berries.

Philodendron

This is generally a climbing vine. Most have large heart-shaped leaves. Contact with the philodendron can cause skin irritation. Ingestion of philodendron plants can cause burning to the lips, mouth and throat. Some children may be attracted to the clutching or climbing aspect of vine houseplants, such as the philodendron.

Rosary Pea

Also known as rosary pearls, these are tropical houseplants bearing red berries. Ingestion of broken seeds causes a delayed reaction of vomiting, nausea, diarrhea, major abdominal pain, burning in the throat and lesions in the mouth and esophagus. The rosary pea can cause death. Because the peas look edible and are bright red, resembling cranberries, they may attract children.

Being sure that the plants in your house are not poisonous to children can save you stress later and even avoid tragedy. Read up on educational materials and consult with poison control centers to better understand which houseplants are safe to have around children and which are not.

Sources:
California Poison Control System
Poisonous Plant Resource Sheet For Childcare Providers (State of NC)

by Lyn Lomasi, Write W.A.V.E. Media Staff

If you are breastfeeding, you'll want to know when to begin weaning your baby from breastmilk. There is no generalized answer to that question. However, the following information may be helpful in determining an answer. Some may be weaning in order to go back to work while others may be weaning for other reasons, such as the transition into solid foods.

When Should I Start Weaning My Baby?

According to KidsHealth.org, the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that babies are breastfed until at least 6 months of age. At that point, it is recommended that a combination of breastmilk and solid foods be given until the baby is at least 1 year old.

Experts will vary on the exact time when moms can begin weaning their baby. Consulting with your child's pediatrician is a great way to be sure that the choice you make is catered to your baby's individual needs. Beyond that, watch for cues from your baby's actions, combining that with the doctor's advice. I always found that combining the doctor's advice with baby's cues led to a successful weaning process.

Transitioning to Solids

Some babies will wean on their own naturally during the transition to solid foods. Others may need their mother to take a leadership role when it comes to weaning. Some are not as willing to wean as others. It may be the easiest to begin weaning your baby when solid foods are a particular interest or distraction. The excitement of new foods may distract the baby's attention from breastfeeding.

When a baby is showing more interest in transitioning to drinking liquids in a cup and eating more solid foods, this is a good indication of when to begin weaning. Baby food and liquid amounts should be discussed with the pediatrician to be sure that baby is eating the correct amount.

Reducing & Eliminating Nightly Feedings

The nightly feedings seem to be the hardest to shy the baby away from. Therefore some mothers opt to use transitioning to solid foods as a perfect opportunity to eliminate nightly feedings. Some mothers may still choose to offer a nightly feeding while transitioning the baby to solids.

Importance of Gradual Weaning

During the process of weaning, you don't want to just stop breastfeeding all of a sudden. Weaning a baby should involve gradually decreasing the amount of breastmilk given, while gradually increasing other forms of nourishment. This helps to ensure that the baby is getting the proper nourishment needed to thrive. If you are at all unsure of what to do during the process, don't hesitate to talk to your child's pediatrician to accurately assess what is healthy for your baby.

-- Note that the author is not a licensed medical professional. The above is provided for informational purposes. Always consult a licensed medical professional for any advice pertaining to health matters.

When your teen is shouting and stomping, you'll try just about anything to get them to stop. But forget about all those fancy programs. If your teen is the average child without any mental or physical conditions, get back to basics. These simple, yet creative methods work time and again when my teen gets a little cranky.

Find your teen a hobby or let them work. Sometimes a cranky teen is simply a bored teen. Give them something to do. This could be something simple like walking the dog daily. They also may want to volunteer at a local animal shelter. My teen daughter visits so much, she is going to apply for an official position this summer. Sports and local community classes are another way to take up that time and release pent up energies. Department stores, restaurants, and many other establishments often have positions teens can apply for.

Spend more time together. You may think they want you to completely disappear. But the truth is, your teen still loves you and wants your attention. Take time out as often as possible to spend with your teen. It doesn't matter so much what you do, as long as you are spending time together. My teen likes me to go with her to the animals shelter. We also might take walks or have a mother and daughter day. If you have other kids, like I do, try rotating time with each one and spending time with all together.

Give teens room to breathe. This may seem to contradict the idea of spending time together. But in order to be happy and balanced, your teen needs both. Let your teen be independent if he's feeling especially moody. The teenage years can come with pent up frustration for many reasons. Friends, hormones, and just life in general could be stressing your teen out. Let him be alone to think before rushing to ask questions. Sometimes too much prodding can cause even more pressure, especially if your teen is facing a difficult issue or decision.

Just listen. If you want your teen to be able to chill the attitude and open up to you, be quiet. I know firsthand that it can be hard not to ask what's going on or analyze the situation. But sometimes us parents just need to keep our lips sealed. The silence can help calm your teen down and make her feel comfortable enough to open up. When she starts talking, don't offer advice right away. Just listen until she is done. Her attitude may be in part due to the fact that she feels no one is listening to her. If you are always offering advice, you could be adding to those insecure thoughts.

Laugh often. I know, I know. This is so simple. It sounds like it is easier said than done. But trust me, when there is constant laughter, your teen will have an easier time ditching the attitude to the curb. I'm not saying don't take problems seriously. But learn to laugh at mistakes and learn from them. Tell jokes all the time, even if they are corny. Laughter helps relieve stress in both teens and adults and can be very helpful in ditching an attitude problem. It's pretty hard not to laugh when everyone else in the room is doing it. Try it. You'll see what I mean.

Keep in mind that there can be serious reasons behind your teen's attitude. So, don't ignore those signs, even if they are faint. Also, be sure your teen has regular visits to the appropriate health professionals.

*I originally published a version of this via Yahoo Contributor Network