Welcoming a new baby can bring out various emotions in the family. Preparing a toddler for a new arrival in the family can be both a wonderful and a stressful time. There are many ways to help your toddler prepare and feel a smooth transition into the idea of having a new baby around the house and many can start during the pregnancy.
Avoid Jealousy Some toddlers may become jealous of a new baby brother or sister. One way to avoid jealousy is to involve the toddler in shopping for the baby. A toddler can also help to prepare the nursery area. You may choose to let the toddler pick out fabric to prepare the new baby's wrap or nursery bedding. You could also consider allowing the toddler to pick a special stuffed animal or other decorative item to be on display in the baby's room. Teaching Involvement Through Experience Another way to prepare and involve a toddler is to teach him or her about babies while the baby is still in the womb. Allowing the toddler to feel the baby move can be helpful in this area as can reading him or her books about babies. Taking the toddler to a daycare, a friend or a relative's house or other location where they can see a baby up close may allow the toddler to prepare for and understand what exactly a baby is. Allowing the child to attend prenatal appointments and see the baby through ultrasound/sonogram as well as hear the heartbeat can also give the toddler a sense of the baby's existence. Help Ease Resentment Anger or resentment is another issue toddlers can experience when there is a new baby introduced to the family. One way to help avoid this is to start any changes related to the toddler in regards to the baby before the toddler even knows about the baby coming. For instance, switching the toddler to a bigger bed in order to reserve and prepare the crib for the baby can cause resentment toward the baby in some children. A possible way to avoid this could be to make the new bed transition before making the announcement of the baby and making the bed transition more of an accomplishment of the toddler rather than an adjustment made to prepare for the new baby. Another situation that could cause resentment is the fact that some toddlers may think the new baby will take all of the attention and love from the parents. If a toddler is used to being the center of attention, the announcement of a new baby may worry him or her and cause thoughts that he or she will be pushed aside to make room for the new baby. Explaining that families have enough love for everyone may help ease the child's mind in this situation. There are various ways to help a toddler prepare and get used to the idea of having a new baby brother or sister in the house. Each family and situation will be unique. Therefore, catering your welcoming methods to your toddler's individual needs may be the best way of all to prepare him or her for the changes that lie ahead. *I originally published a version of this via Yahoo Contributor Network by Lyn Lomasi, Write W.A.V.E. Media Staff  When children are faced with bedwetting, it's important that they still feel good about themselves. Bedwetting is a natural occurrence and is something most children will eventually grow out of. As a parent and role model, you should be positive about your child's bedwetting to make him or her feel secure. Being positive means taking healthy steps toward resolving the issue and also having a positive attitude about the situation.
Avoid negative reactions. Getting frustrated with your child about bedwetting is unnecessary and may worsen the situation. The wrong reaction can lower a child's self-esteem. Never punish your child for wetting the bed. Remember that your child cannot control bedwetting and is not misbehaving. Instead of disciplining your child, give rewards whenever he or she achieves a dry night. Use protective undergarments. The use of protective undergarments helps children feel secure when dealing with bedwetting. It prevents their clothes from getting soiled, thus allowing them to avoid uncomfortable or embarrassing situations. Bedwetting diapers can be bulky and feel more like a punishment than a preventative measure. Try a product like Pampers UnderJams. They are designed to look and feel like regular underwear, except that they absorb moisture. This way, if your child wants to attend a sleepover, he or she will feel comfortable and secure wearing the undetectable UnderJams, even away from home. Talk to your child about products like Pampers UnderJams, but don't call them "diapers." Explain to your child they are absorbent underwear and not like the diapers they wore when they were younger. Provide easy restroom access. If the restroom is close to where the child sleeps, it can help deter certain bedwetting issues. On the other hand, if the bathroom is not easily accessible, it may be difficult for the child to get there on time, especially in the middle of the night. There should always be a clear path from your child's room to the bathroom, without things like toys and furniture in the way. Reward your child whenever he or she wakes up in the middle of the night to use the restroom in order to reinforce this behavior. Reassure your child. Be understanding and reassuring to help your child feel comfortable. Your reassurance helps to build and maintain your son or daughter's self-confidence. One of the best ways to be positive about bedwetting is to tell your child that wetting the bed is perfectly normal. Remind your child that you are very proud of him or her for staying dry during the day. Let your child know that bedwetting is just a phase, and that very soon, he or she will grow out of it and will wake up to a dry bed every time. Encourage evening bathroom trips. Be sure your child uses the restroom frequently during the day. Even more importantly, have your child make a bathroom trip right before bed. Do so even if he or she just went to the restroom 30 minutes ago. A pre-bedtime bathroom trip will help to ensure that the child's bladder is empty before bed and will reduce the frequency of bedwetting incidents. Encourage your child whenever he or she successfully urinates right before bed. The Importance of Toddler Shadow Discovery: "I'm Right There - There's Me!" (Activities Included)2/12/2015
by Lyn Lomasi, Write W.A.V.E. Media Staff  Image by Keoni Cabral via Flickr.com "I'm right there! There's me!" Those are the words my son exclaimed as a toddler when he had just discovered his shadow was a mirror image of himself. Making this connection is an important step in a child's life. It shows the ability to distinguish connections between two objects. In this case, he is connecting his shadow to himself. Whether your child has made this distinction or not, it is important to help this discovery along. As an experienced mother, homeschooler, and care provider, I have had plenty of experience as well as study in this subject and others pertaining to childhood development. Below you will see activities for both toddlers who have already discovered their shadows, as well as those who have not. Any of the activities can be done with either group of toddlers. If the lighting is right outdoors, you may do these activities outdoors. If not, just get near a bright light or lamp in the house.
Shadow Puppets Perhaps the most common shadow game is making shadow puppets from your hands and reflecting them onto the wall or sidewalk. Toddler favorites usually include a bunny, a dinosaur, a dog, a cat, and even people. Draw on your child's interests and be creative. For some toddlers, it may only take the easy talking mouth to entertain them. But, whatever you do, be sure to expose them to a variety of interesting characters and shapes. Depending on your child's coordination and attention span, you may be able to teach him or her how to do these on their own. That's where the game gets even more fun. When I Move, He Moves, Too! For this one, all you need to do is show your child that your shadow moves with you. Have the child move as well, showing the child that their own shadow will move when they move as well. Keep the game going by doing funny things and focusing on what the shadow does, too. Some toddlers will play this game for a long time, others will only last for a few minutes. Try to keep it interesting enough to last around 5 to 10 minutes. Taller/Shorter In this game you guess it, you'll focus on doing things that make the shadow shorter and taller. You can crouch down and come back up for one idea. Another way to do this is that sometimes when you back up, the shadow grows taller. Doing the reverse will make it shorter again. Experiment with your toddler, remembering to explain about tall and short. Bigger/Smaller This is similar to taller/shorter, except that with this one, you'll do what you can make the shadow wider and larger. If you are doing it inside, drawing yourself away from the wall and towards the wall can produce results with this. If you're outside, it's a matter of where and how the sun is shining,so experiment to find out what works. Shadow Show In this activity, you will actually put on a shadow puppet show for the child. It would be like a puppet show, except with shadows instead. To make it even better, all lights can be turned out and the show presenter can get behind a large screen, consisting of a white or light colored sheet. The light source should be coming from behind the screen. Just put on the show like you normally would on the wall, except your hands won't be in the way of the shadow. Be creative and make sure the characters talk and interact with one another. Favorite Story In Shadow This is very similar to the shadow show, except you will be actually reading and acting out your child's favorite story. You may need a page turner behind the screen for you, unless you have memorized the story. Note to parents: The toddler age is an important age of discovery. Doing activities such as those listed above can help your child develop important discovery and learning skills. Be sure to practice discovery and learning skills each day through play and interaction. *I originally published a version of this via Yahoo Contributor Network by Lyn Lomasi, Write W.A.V.E. Media Staff  "Smack!" With your mouth wide open, you ask "Did my toddler just hit me?" As strangers and friends look on, you struggle to get the situation under control. Feeling the sting of the hand from none other than your own precious little toddler can be hard. It's even more difficult when you're in public. I've dealt with this situation both as an onlooker, as well as from a personal standpoint.
Act immediately. The most important thing you can do with a behavior like this is regain control as soon as possible. As soon as your toddler hits you, there needs to be an action from you. This could vary, depending on your child, the severity of the incident, and your parenting methods. Whether you put your child in timeout, leave the location, or something else entirely, it needs to be done right away. Let your toddler know you mean business. Toddlers like pushing buttons. This is how they learn how to interact with people. Remember that while very smart, this is a stage where kids are trying to understand which behaviors are acceptable. They will be very persistent and will also test you to see what they can get away with. Some may do it more in public because they feel you are more vulnerable to quickly placating them. Whatever you let them do is what they will believe to be correct. If smacking you gets a giggle or a request, this behavior will be repeated. I once had a friend who unintentionally taught her toddler to hit her on the leg every time he wanted her attention. If she didn't comply, he kept at it until she gave in. She would joke about how cute it was. It wasn't cute anymore when he attempted the same trick with a teacher. Toddlers repeat what they see. If you use spanking as discipline in your home, your toddler could be repeating the behavior. They also could be repeating what a friend or sibling does. Perhaps she saw hitting on TV. Just because your toddler is hitting you, it doesn't mean she hates you. She may simply be repeating an action she saw elsewhere. If you don't want your toddler to hit you or anyone else, do your best not to let her be around that behavior. Everyone will know best. If your toddler hits you in public, be prepared for advice from all sides. Any and every one will have their thoughts on the matter. It's a natural instinct, especially for fellow parents, to speak up on such matters. Some thoughts may be lighthearted. But other words may sting. For your toddler's sake, keep cool. If you see things are headed in the wrong direction, it's best to leave the scene. The worst thing you can do when your toddler is hitting is to cause other negative behaviors, such as arguing. Emphasize the pain. Even if it doesn't hurt much when your toddler hits you, he needs to know that it can. Now this does not mean you should hit him back. That's not a very positive thing to do and if you're in public (or even in private) it could land you discipline time, instead of your toddler. There are other ways to model feelings. Make sad faces and also ask your toddler what it feels like when he gets hit by someone. Make it clear that hitting gets the bad attention, not the good attention. Compare hitting to hugs and ask your toddler which one he likes better. Answer with a "me too" when he chooses hugs. Then, give him a big hug and tell him you hope he gives you lots more of those every day. *I originally published this via Yahoo Contributor Network by Lyn Lomasi, Staff Writer  When your toddler experiences bed-wetting, the best thing you can do is positively reinforce the dry nights. Your child is likely frustrated and embarrassed by bed-wetting. Therefore, some focus on the positive aspects will help keep his or her self-esteem up. This advice is meant for toddlers no longer in diapers during the day.
Buy new bedding. This may seem an odd method or even counter-intuitive, but as your toddler starts to have more dry nights, you can reward him or her with all new bedding, from the sheets to the comforter. Let your toddler choose what he or she likes. Be sure that your child knows he or she is getting the new bedding for staying dry all night. This form of positive reinforcement is most effective during the last stages, when bed-wetting has slowed considerably. Give special rewards for waking up dry. While bed-wetting is not the child's fault, it is still beneficial to offer rewards for dry nights. These should be something simple, like a sticker or a new coloring book. When dry nights start to occur more frequently, the reward-giving can slow down some. That way, your toddler does not come to expect a gift every morning. But a nice surprise every now and then is still a great positive reinforcement. Show affection and encouragement. When your toddler has dry nights, give your child a hug and let him or her know how proud you are. A parent's approval is everything to a small child. Just this simple action alone can do wonders for your toddler's self-esteem. It may not completely solve the problem, but knowing that someone notices the positive aspects helps a child overcome bed-wetting and any negative emotions it might cause.. Don't focus on the negative. Offer a temporary solution for bed-wetting. Diapers are one option. But again, that could be embarrassing for your toddler. Protective underpants, such as Pampers UnderJams, can help solve that issue. Once you have found your temporary solution, bed-wetting won't seem like such a big deal to your toddler, and you will not focus as much on the fact that the child is experiencing bed-wetting. Instead, offer praise for dry nights. Focusing on the negative aspects, such as soiled clothing and sheets, can only compound the situation. *I originally published this via Yahoo Contributor Network by Lyn Lomasi, Staff Writer  No one is a perfect parent, not even me, as a parenting expert. There is no such thing as perfection when it comes to raising kids. However, there are certain parenting mishaps we just shouldn't do or let our toddlers see. As a veteran parent and former nanny, I've had plenty of experience with toddlers who hit. It's not always something the parent is doing. But there are at least 5 parenting no-nos that could teach toddlers to use violence to get their way. Are you unintentionally participating in these parenting no-nos that may encourage hitting in toddlers?
Fighting in front of toddlers is a big parenting no-no. Arguing in front of your toddler can cause him stress, frustration, anger, and other issues. When this fighting is physical, it is even worse. Domestic violence is never appropriate. But it's especially inappropriate in front of a toddler. By hitting each other in front of watchful little eyes, you are encouraging hitting in your toddler. Counseling, separation, or even jail time for the offending party may be the best option for a couple that takes this route. Seek authorities and a professional's guidance right away if there is any physical violence in your home. Being physical in anger can encourage hitting, even if you are not directly hitting anyone. Slamming items down, throwing things, or hitting things when frustrated teaches your toddler to be physical when upset. While you may not be hitting a person, you are still acting out your anger in a negative physical manner. Parenting behaviors like this encourage hitting in toddlers. If you feel like you need to do something physical to express the anger, try jogging, yoga, playing basketball, or another form of exercise. Treating animals poorly can encourage hitting in toddlers. As the parent, you are supposed to be a positive example. Animals are living beings, just like you and I. Mistreating animals not only teaches your toddler to do the same. But it also teaches him to use violence when annoyed with something. Children, especially toddlers, follow the lead of their parents. They learn by observance. Even when you think they are not watching, they are. If you can't have a pet in your home without hitting and other negative treatment, please find a new, more loving, home for the animal. This will be good for your toddler, as well as the pet Laughing at violence is never good. Certain television programs and movies may make a mockery of violent acts. While older children may possibly understand the difference between movies and real life, a toddler may not. The same is true for video games that encourage hitting and other violence as a way to get ahead in the game. Then, of course there is reality. Never, ever laugh about violent acts in your toddler's presence. While it may not be intentional, by doing this, you are encouraging hitting and other forms of violence. In a toddler's eyes, laughing may mean that the violence is OK. Spanking can also encourage hitting. Yes, I know I am going to upset some people by saying this. I respect that not everyone has the same disciplinary methods. But in my experience, toddlers whose parents used spanking for discipline hit far more than those whose parents used other methods. If you think about it for a moment, it makes sense. Spanking is the act of hitting someone for an undesired behavior. In a toddler's eyes, this may send the message that when they don't like a behavior in another person, they should hit that person. There are more positive forms of discipline than spanking that still teach your toddler effectively. *I originally published this via Yahoo Contributor Network by Lyn Lomasi, Staff Writer  Your toddler is having a meltdown that takes the effort of four nurses just to get a look at her ears. Ten minutes later, they are still trying to get her to say "ah" to do a quick strep test. If this sounds like your child, you could use some help soothing those doctor's visit tantrums. The methods I used on my own children have been put to the test and proven successful time and again. Bring distractions to the doctor's office. Healthy snacks, like trail mix, work wonders for keeping kids in a good mood. It also keeps them busy during less comfortable moments. Books and toys can come in handy for the waiting time, as well as during stressful times. Crayons and a coloring book can soothe the nerves and keep a toddler's mind off other things. When tantrums occur, distractions are often more effective than words for toddlers. They may tune out your voice. But their eyes may light up at the sight of something fun.
Have a soothing item handy. Even if you use other items for distraction, always have a special item for dire situations. This should be whatever soothes your toddler. In case a tantrum occurs at the doctor visit, this will be your secret weapon, so to speak. It might be a favorite blanket or toy. As long as it is something your child is very attached to, it will do the trick for the moment. Use the other distraction items for minor issues and keeping your little one busy. Only save the special item for the critical moments, such as getting shots or any other moments your child may have a tantrum.
Hold your child during the examination. Most pediatricians understand that kids can get a little frightened. When my kids were toddlers, the doctor would let me hold them during the examination. Most every child sees their parent as a comfort zone. It's also easier to keep your child's arms from grabbing at the doctor or his instruments when he needs to get close. Plus, you get to hug your child right after the examination is complete, which will be a great soother for you both. Make it fun. Try turning the doctor's visit into something to look forward to. If you make it into an adventure, your child is likely to follow suit. During the moments when the doctor is not in the room, you can show your child around and explain things. Emphasize on what a cool place it is. You can make comments such as "Isn't it neat how the doctor can see all the way inside your ears with this?" "It's so cool that he can tell if you're sick or not just by doing this." "Good thing we have doctors to help us out." When kids hear these things, it is definitely more soothing than "Sit down and relax" or "Don't touch that. It's dangerous." You can keep them safe without making the doctor's office seem so scary and dangerous. *I originally published this via Yahoo Contributor Network by Lyn Lomasi, Staff Writer  Potty training a child is sometimes a difficult task, but it doesn't have to be. I have potty trained my four children, as well as assisted in the potty training of various children I've cared for as a nanny or babysitter. There are many things a parent or caregiver can do to make it easier on themselves, as well as the child. Making and using a simple potty training chart is one very helpful aid in the process. A potty training chart is easy to make and cost-effective as well.
Materials Only a few things are needed to make this easy-to-use potty training chart.
How To Make The Potty Training Chart To make your child a simple, but effective potty training chart, gather the materials listed above. First, take the darkest color in your marker set and draw a line across the middle of one sheet of poster board lengthwise. Next draw six lines down the width (from top to bottom), making fourteen even-sized boxes on the poster board - seven on the top row and seven on the bottom. Now cut thirty-six small squares out of one side of the adhesive Velcro. Stick four squares into each box. The Velcro squares should be spread apart evenly. Stick the remaining four squares in the four corners on the backside of the poster board potty training chart. Next, you'll need to draw some very simple symbols to represent the steps involved in potty training (listed below). You'll draw these on the other piece of white poster board. Each icon should only be about 2" in size. Some suggestions are a clock, a tissue roll, a toilet, and a hand. Once you have drawn a basic outline of each icon and outlined it in a dark color, color it in if you wish. Then, cut them all out and place a Velcro square on each, remembering to use the other side of the Velcro, so that they will stick to the side you have used on the chart. Hang your chart in a spot in your bathroom that is easy for your toddler to reach and see. Your toddler will be the one operating the chart. To hang the chart, simply place squares cut from the second side of the Velcro adhesive onto the wall or other hanging area in a way that will line up with how you've placed the squares on the back of the potty training chart. Now it's time to get training! How To Use The Potty Training Chart This simple potty training chart is designed with the child in mind. The little one will actually be controlling the potty training chart, with the supervision of the parent or caregiver. First, show the chart to your child and explain what it is for in simple terms. Then, instruct the child on how to use the potty and have the child do so with the following suggested steps. Potty Steps
Hand the child the chart icons and allow the child to place them on the chart after all the steps have been completed. As the child uses the potty each time, the icons should move over a space. If the child has an accident, they move back to the beginning. When the child has used the potty 14 times in a row with no accident, present the child with some kind of award. I like to use free printable potty certificates. FreePrintableCertificates.net has a cute one. *I originally published this via Yahoo Contributor Network
by Lyn Lomasi, Staff Writer
by Lyn Lomasi, Staff Writer
Socks on the floor Shoes by the door Pants in the hamper Shirt's getting damper Getting ready to go But the toddler says no Then soils himself Mischievous like an elf Teenager's on the phone Baby starts to moan You all rush out In a crying bout Just like any other morning *I originally published this parenting poetry via Yahoo Contributor Network |
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Lyn Lomasi is founder and owner of the Brand Shamans network. She is your brand healing, soul healing, marketing & content superhero to the rescue! Running a network of websites, tackling deadlines single-handedly, and coaching fellow writers, brands, & entrepreneurs to be thought leaders is her top priority.
While rescuing civilians from boring content and brands, this awesomely crazy family conquers the world, managing Intent-sive Nature while going on Upstream Parenting adventures & lessons, sometimes in an RV. They strive to cuddle with lions and giraffes. Until then, they settle for rescue dogs and cats. By supporting us, you support a single parent, healer, and minority small business that donates to and/or stands for several causes, including homeless pets, homeless people, trans youth, equality, helping starving artists, and more! A portion of all proceeds from our all-inclusive store, Intent-sive Nature goes toward worthy causes. For guidance in the world of freelance writing or for advice on her specialty topics, Ask Lyn. Archives
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