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Oxford, AL Charges People $500 For Using Restroom Opposite of Gender On Birth Certificates

4/28/2016

 
by Rayne Flutterby, Write W.A.V.E. Media Contributor & Advocate
Picture
Image © slgckgc; Flickr.com
Don't ever use the so-called wrong bathroom in Oxford, Alabama unless you have five-hundred bucks lying around, as well as up to six months time to sit in jail. A law was just passed there stating that anyone who uses a public restroom that doesn't match the gender on their birth certificate is subject to a fine of $500 and up to six months in jail. It's considered a criminal misdemeanor offense. What?

How stupid and completely inhumane is that? As Lyn Lomasi pointed out in the comment section of another post I wrote on this topic:
"It's not fair for someone to be judged for who they are. There are plenty of women who might look boyish to someone else and plenty of men who might look more feminine to another. But that's just who they are. Not all of them are even part of the LGBT community. Of course, I believe gender doesn't matter. But in creating these laws, a whole other set of issues is created, where people are judging each other based on who they think they are, rather than who they actually are."
In that instance, a police officer asked a lesbian woman who "looked too boyish" for her ID to prove that she was a woman and when she didn't have one with her, she was made to leave the restroom.

Is this kind of thing going to become the new normal? If so, that is a sad state for our country to be in. I thought the whole point of this country was so that people could be free to be who they are and be treated equally. Laws that exclude certain people do just the opposite.

It's a good thing there are companies like Target, who stick up for people and allow them to use the restroom and fitting room according to how they identify.

But more people need to stand up for the rights for others if we ever want things to change. This law and other laws like it feel unconstitutional (I'm no legal expert) and at the very least extremely immoral.

Let's face it. If you're in the bathroom with me and you see what's under my clothing, you are the pervert, not me. Can't we all just go in there, close our own stall, mind our business, and do our own business? Seems pretty simple to me.

*above quote used with permission

Stephen Colbert (Humorously) Speaks Truth On Public Bathroom Controversy [VIDEO]

4/28/2016

 
by Lyn Lomasi, Write W.A.V.E. Media Staff
Watch as late night comic Stephen Colbert hilariously destroys those who support laws against people using the public restroom they prefer.

Caitlyn Jenner: Transitioning into a Woman

10/4/2015

 
By, Crystal S. Kauffman, Contributing Writer
Picture
©Vanity Fair
Caitlyn Jenner (formerly known as Bruce Jenner) has her own reality show, which is chronicling her transition from a man into a woman. Caitlyn or Cait identifies herself as transgender, however she was able to transition so quickly in isolation and she didn’t learn all that she needed to. An interesting moment happened, when Scott (Kourtney K. Husband) came by to see Caitlyn. They both talked and Scott really seemed to understand that she was truly happy, even happier than in the past.

They discussed the famous Vanity Fair Article, where Scott explained why the family was angry. In the next few episodes, Kim K. West stopped by to talk to Cait about the article as well. She pointed out things she thought were unfair and asked Cait not to bash the family on her rise to fame. Additionally, Caitlyn visited Khloe K. at her house and she spoke with Caitlyn about the article. Basically, Khloe asked Cait not to bash her mother Kris and that she should explain herself better to Kylie and Kendall. 

Finally, Caitlyn musters up the strength to call Kris Jenner and he invites her to come over for a talk to her about the kids and other stuff. The next day, she showed up and was pleasantly surprised, by how she looks and how good she is doing. They begin talking and Kris admits she is having problems, because she is mourning the man he used to be for 25 years…Bruce Jenner! Thankfully, the talk allows them to start anew and they agree to talk more about the kids.

Caitlyn finally meets a group of women, who are transgender and accepting of Cait. Suddenly, Caitlyn feels ecstatic and elated to be in a group of women that understand how she is feeling. Caitlyn whisks the women on a road trip and they all enjoy themselves, while talking about how they felt during each of their transitions in to women hood. As Caitlyn, she is honest about how she feels and about things she doesn’t know.

The friendly group of women helped Cait to identify with the LGBT community in her city and state, which help her find a new purpose in life. She went to several places and listen to youth who transitioned young and parents that have been supporting their child’s choice. In addition, Caitlyn met other adult women who are transgender, but she learned that it is hard them to find job because they are transgender.

Caitlyn also created a naming ceremony to announce her new name, but it was also for the other women in her group as well. Boy George and Candis sang for the ceremony and it was absolutely nice and beautiful. The tabloids have said the Candis and Caitlyn are dating, but they are actually really good friends. They spend a lot of time together, because are both transgender and they enjoy each other’s company.

Amazingly Caitlyn’s mother had broken her hip, but that didn’t stop her from coming to visit her new daughter. Caitlyn’s sisters came with their mother and each accepted her for who she was, instead of putting her down. At the Espy Awards, Caitlyn shined as she received her award and gave her speech which was from her heart. Both Caitlyn’s family was there and her children were there, as each person cheered her on and the audience cheered her on as well.
 
Reference:
Personal Experience
Watched  Season 1- I am Cait

Picture
©Unknown

List of LGBT Terms & Definitions

9/13/2015

 
by Lyn Lomasi, Write W.A.V.E. Media Staff
Picture
Image © Tony Webster; Flickr.com
The following is a list of terms commonly used within the LGBTQ Community (or those used toward this community by others), as well as their definitions. This list is an evolving one and will be updated continuously with terms, definitions, and links to resources. Please comment with any terminology we have left out, useful resources, and also feel free to let us know if you agree or disagree with anything we’ve stated here. It is important to us, as well as our audience that our information is as accurate, detailed, and comprehensive as possible.

Advocate - Any person who works to support a group (in this case, the LGBT Community), whether through funds, awareness, education, or other means

Ally - A straight person who supports the LGBT community

Androgynous - A gender expression used to describe someone who has both male and female traits or anatomy; also sometimes used in place of “intersexual” to describe individuals who possess both male and female anatomy

Androsexual - Someone who is attracted to masculinity, males, or men

Asexual - Someone with very little to zero attraction to anyone of any gender

Bigender - Someone who fluctuates between the typical man and woman gender identities and, in some cases, may also identify with a third gender

Biphobia - Intolerance, fear, misinformation, aversion to, or hatred toward the bisexual community as a whole or to individuals who identify as bisexual - this behavior is common in (but not limited to) some people struggling with their own sexual identity

Bisexual - Someone who is attracted to both males and females. Also see pansexual, which includes being attracted to those who identify as anything other than cisgender males and females

Binary - Limiting gender roles to “man” or “woman” and excluding any other possibilities
Note: A cisgender individual can still be non-binary, as they might still be attracted to other genders. Binary individuals are those who mistakenly believe there can only be cisgender individuals.

Cis or Cisgender - Someone whose biological gender and gender identity is aligned

Closeted - Someone who is not open regarding their gender or sexual identity; this individual has not “come out of the closet”

Coming Out - Revealing a gender or sexual identity; “coming out of the closet”

Cross-Dressing - Wearing clothing that conflicts with what is typical for your gender identity (such as a man putting on a skirt); this might be done just for fun, for sexual gratification, for self-expression, or even for relaxation. Cross-dressing is not always an indication of wanting to be the opposite sex.

Drag King - A cross-dressing performer who expresses masculinity (or the male form) in a strong way; usually done by a female in a drag show; the drag king may also be the winner of said show

Drag Queen - A cross-dressing performer who expresses femininity (or the female form) in a strong way; usually done by a male in a drag show; the drag queen may also be the winner of said show

Dyke - An insult used to belittle lesbian women; some lesbian women have reclaimed this term and use it with each other as a term of endearment, yet others are still uncomfortable with this term.

Fag or faggot - An insult used to belittle gay men; some gay men have reclaimed this term and use it with each other as a term of endearment, yet others are still uncomfortable with this term.

Fluid - Ever-changing; A gender fluid individual may change identities as they see fit for each situation or as they feel they are comfortable. This can happen within the span of a few seconds, minutes, days, months, or years. This individual is not confused, transitioning, or choosing between identities, but is comfortable with two or more identities and identifies with each.

FTM - Female to male; This is a person who has undergone medical procedures to align anatomy with gender identity, often confused with a trans-man.

Gay - Having an attraction to the same sex; most often used for male to male attractions, but can be used for others as well

Gender Dysphoria - A feeling that the biological sex of your body isn’t right; those with Gender Dysphoria (GD) may also have Gender Identity Disorder (GID). However, the two are not the same. Not all trans people have GD or GID, but some have one or the other or both. GD is also not to be confused with Body Dysmorphic Dysphoria (or BDD). Those with GD usually see a decrease or disappearance of of the effects of GD if they change their gender role to match the one they feel is correct.

Gender Identity Disorder (GID) - GID is an official mental disorder that can only be diagnosed by a licensed psychiatrist. However, those with GID exhibit a strong and persistent gross-gender identification, have persistent discomfort about biologically assigned sexually anatomy or an inappropriateness in the gender role of said sexual assignment, and exhibit clinically significant distress in functioning occupationally, socially, or in other important areas. Those with GID might also experience Gender Dysphoria (GD), but not always. Not all trans people experience GID or GD.

Gender Expression - The outward/external display of the gender which an individual identifies with; this may refer to clothing, social behaviors, grooming habits, hairstyles, and other factors.

Gender Identity - The internal representation of the gender you identify with, whether it aligns with your biological gender or not; this is the gender you consider yourself to be

Genderless - An individual who does not identify with any gender role

Genderqueer - An individual who identifies with a gender outside the typical binary roles of man and woman; someone who identifies as neither man nor woman or someone who identifies with both or somewhere in between

Gender Neutral - Avoiding labels or attitudes based on typical gender roles; gender-neutral individuals might wear either male or female clothing, not worrying about the difference. However, not everyone who calls themselves gender neutral would do so. This might also refer to an individual who does not determine rights of others or attitudes about others based on gender roles. A gender neutral individual may be an ally to the LGBT or might be a part of it. Gender neutrality is not restrictive to the LGBT community. Some may ask others to use a gender-neutral pronoun (they, them) when referring to them.

Gynesexual - Having an attraction to females or femininity

Hermaphrodite - An out-of-circuit (no longer used) medical term that was used for intersex individuals, prior to current medical information. Hermaphrodite refers to someone who is 100% male and 100% female at the same time, which is impossible. Instead, intersex is the preferred and more accurate term for someone who has both male and female anatomy. This can refer to any combination thereof, such as having both a uterus and a penis.

Heterosexism - Belief or behavior indicative of heterosexuals being better, superior, or preferred over those in the queer community

Homophobia - Intolerance, fear, misinformation, aversion to, or hatred toward the queer community as a whole or to queer individuals - this behavior is common in (but not limited to) some people struggling with their own sexual identity

Homosexual - Medical term for a person who is attracted to individuals of the same biological sex; some in the LGBT community take offense to this term and instead prefer the terms gay or lesbian, as “homo” or “homosexual” has become an insult in some crowds

Hypersexual - Having a highly intense sexual attraction that may be classified as an addiction - some proponents are pushing for this to be included as an official mental disorder, due to the severity

Intersex - Someone who has any combination of both male and female anatomy, such as having both a uterus and a penis

In the Closet - See “closeted”

Lesbian - A female who is attracted to females

LGBTQ+ - Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transexual, Queer, etc; refers to anyone who is not a  straight cisgender individual; also refers to the community of said individuals

MTF - Male to female; This is a person who has undergone medical procedures to align anatomy with gender identity, often confused with a trans-woman.

Non-Binary or Nonbinary - Any gender role that does not fit within the confines of a typical binary role (see the antonym, binary)

Out, Outing, Or Outed - Forced out of the closet; i.e someone else has revealed a gender or sexual identity to others that was supposed to be a secret

Partner - Mate, spouse, or significant other

Preferred Pronoun - The pronoun an individual identifies with (i.e. he, she, or they)

Queer - This was once a derogatory term, used to insult those in the LGBTQ+ community. It has since been reclaimed as a symbol of pride among the community. This term is often used to represent anyone who does not fall into straight cisgender roles.

Questioning - A term used to refer to someone who is in the process of figuring out their sexual or gender identity

Same-Gender Loving (SGL) - A term for “lesbian” or “gay” used by some in the black LGBT community as an alternative to terms that may be used by the white LGBT community

Sexual Orientation - the type of attraction (whether sexual, spiritual, or otherwise) that one feels for others, based upon their gender relationship to each other (i.e gay, lesbian, bisexual, pansexual, etc); not to be confused with sexual preference

Sexual Preference - the types of intercourse and gratification one prefers to participate in; not to be mistaken for sexual orientation

Skoliosexual - Having an attraction to those who identify as genderqueer, transsexual, or anything other than cisgender

Straight - This is a cisgender individual that is attracted only to the opposite sex.

Third-Gender - Someone who identifies with a gender other than the typical “man” or “woman” genders; recognized in some societies who accept that there are at least three genders, possibly more

Transgender - Anyone who is not cisgender; not to be used as transgendered, as it implies something was done to make them that way, which is not always the case. The -ed is not preferred, and in some cases, may be an insult

Transitioning - A person who is in the process of becoming the gender they identify with

Transphobia - Intolerance, fear, misinformation, aversion to, or hatred toward those who are transexual or transgender - this behavior is common in (but not limited to) some people struggling with their own sexual identity

Transsexual - An individual whose gender identity is the binary opposite of that which they were born with. This person may have medical procedures to correct this, but not necessarily. They also may present themselves as the opposite sex. This is not to be confused with a trans-man or a trans-woman, which is different.

Trans-man - Someone who was born as the female sex, but identifies as a man. This is not the same as being a transsexual man or an FTM.

Trans-woman - Someone who was born as the male sex, but identifies as a woman. This is not the same as being a transsexual woman or an MTF.

Two-Spirit - A Native American term used to describe an individual who takes on or possesses qualities of more than one gender role

Being Pansexual Doesn't Make Someone Unfaithful

9/13/2015

 
by Lyn Lomasi, Write W.A.V.E. Media Staff
Picture
Image © Daquella manera; Flickr.com
If you truly love someone, you won't be unfaithful, right? According to comments I've been reading on social media lately, that only applies if you prefer just one sex. Therefore, pansexual people (those who are attracted to people of any gender or gender identity) can't have a faithful relationship. What?

Who you choose to be with doesn't determine whether YOU are a faithful person or not. That's almost like blaming the partner when someone cheats on them. If a person chooses to cheat (and yes, it is a choice), that person would have likely done so regardless of the gender of the person they are cheating on.

Someone with a cheating mentality will do so for a variety of reasons. However, if their brain already okays it for one reason, who’s to say it won’t do so for another and another and another.. and so on? People don’t cheat simply because they are pansexual. They cheat because they are cheaters.

In fact, as a pansexual, I can say that pansexuals may be less likely to cheat for gender-related reasons than those of any other sexual orientation. Why? The very definition of pansexuality should explain that.

Most people who identify with the pan label love souls, not genders. Many, like myself, don’t factor gender in at all when choosing a mate. Rather, a mate is chosen and appreciated based on who they are as a person.


There is often no craving for a specific gender, as gender is not what defines how a mate is chosen. A pansexual might choose to be with a female, a male, a trans individual, a fluid individual, a binary or non-binary individual, and any combination thereof or in between.

Again, we see a beautiful soul, not a label or body part. This is not to say that pansexuals can’t or won’t cheat. Anyone can cheat. However, to say that all pansexuals are unfaithful is absolutely ridiculous, based on the facts mentioned above.


Because there is often not a specific gender being sought after, and all gender identities are appreciated, there is no reason to cheat based solely on the gender of a chosen mate. Cheating is of course possible for a pansexual person, just as much as it’s possible for any person.

However, the choice of a pansexual person to cheat on their partner is more likely to be based on other factors and insecurities than it is to be based on the fact that they are pansexual or that their partner is not a specific gender.


Knowledge before judgement - it’s always a good thing.

P.S. The author is (gasp!) a faithful pansexual.

The Thrill, The Agony, And The Battles Yet To Be Won

7/10/2015

 
by Dennis Townsend, Contributing Writer
Picture
Image courtesy of www.usnews.com
And so it begins, the beginning of the end, or the beginning of the beginning, at this point the world is just about to spin off its axis. The United States Of America is at odds with its past, and its future and it seems old wounds never really heal, they’re just scabbed over until somebody picks at it and the wound is once again opened. Right now the hardest pill to swallow is the pill of change and some people feel they are being dragged, kicking and screaming into the future when they feel the past is where they want to remain. Welcome to civilization.

The Supreme Court Of The United States has this country coming and going with it's popular and unpopular landmark decisions and it seems to me as though they’re playing both sides of the fence. The Republican Party was under the misguided impression, and so were we I might add, that they were in command of the high court when said court ruled that “money was speech”, along with the Hobby Lobby ruling and then ruling that rules for voting could be changed which effectively diminished the easy availability of some minority voters to cast their ballots via early voting and also put a strain on those needing identification to vote. And, now all of a sudden, just to keep us guessing, they’ve jumped to the other side of the fence and upheld the Affordable Care Act subsidies, and then really tipped the scales with the landmark ruling that same sex marriages are legal in all states and a constitutional right. The Republican Party says that this same-sex ruling, more than any other, will lead this country into ruins.You must remember that the Republicans claim to be big fans of Christian values and they say to allow gays and lesbians to marry and raise a family is the sign of a country gone morally corrupt thanks to that “man” in the White House and the unpredictable Supreme Court. Justice Anthony Scalia has reduced himself to the point of name-calling when it comes to talking about the decisions his colleagues made recently despite his best pre-paid efforts to sway them otherwise. 

The rainbow community has won a great victory based on the freedom of the right to choose.  The same reason we use to invade other countries calling ourselves great liberators of the world, cape flying and righting injustices everywhere when others “right to choose” is threatened. But following the advise of your own sermon can  be a monumental task. It is true that the Bible has defined a traditional marriage as one between a man and a woman for the last 6,000 years, and speaks of sodomy and lost morality, but it also speaks of love, forgiveness and helping the sick and the poor. Lawyers are fond of telling their clients that there is no way of knowing how a judge or jury will rule so who’s to say how God will rule on this latest evolution of mankind. When Adam bit into that apple despite being warned, God knew at that point that all bets were off as far as our evolution was concerned. We would all be naked if Adam hadn’t suddenly realized that he was feeling a draft in all the wrong places, and grabbed a fig leaf and invented shorts. And since then humans have steadily been evolving regardless of the blueprint laid out in the Bible.

This country is being torn apart by those who claim they are for human rights, but only the rights they find appropriate. Love does not discriminate and cupid’s arrow strikes were it’s aimed. There are those who will tell you that who you love makes a difference but there is two sides to this sword. Whether someone falls in love with a convicted killer,  a person of another race, or a person of the same gender, it is their right to choose and that right and their decisions should be respected, period! There is not one GOP politician who can talk about morality after doing nothing in memory of the slaughtered school children in Newtown, Conn. But stand by, they are about to move Heaven and Earth to stop same sex-couples from getting married. Even after the courts decision, there are some states that still refuse to comply and so the battles begin but I must admit, I feel kind of sorry for the Republicans, because it’s plain to see, like everyone else's, their money just doesn’t buy what it use to. Too bad.

DLTPONCHO33

Touching Video Reactions to Marriage Equality History

6/28/2015

 
by Lyn Lomasi, Write W.A.V.E. Media Staff
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The White House Lit Up in Support of Equality -- Image © tedeytan; Flickr.com
In case you haven't heard the news, on June 26, 2015, the United States Supreme Court found bans on marriage to be unconstitutional. This finally makes marriage equality a reality in the United States.

Watch the emotional video below (ft The Rhodes Bros) to see the touching reactions as marriage equality is announced. I dare you not to cry. Nevermind. You won't win that dare. 

#LoveWins

I'm Straight, Right? Why Labels Are Wrong

7/9/2014

0 Comments

 
by Lyn Lomasi, Write W.A.V.E. Media Staff
Picture
 If you're among my circle of friends and family, you probably see me as a straight woman, correct? Well, you would be both right and wrong with this assumption. Why? Well, it's just not that simple, so let me break it down.

First, let's give credit where credit is due. My friend  San at Informed Sharing wrote a post called “I Like Girls” and it inspired me to give my thoughts as well. Incidentally, she also inspired me to do this “Pieces of Me” series, modeled after her own.

Most people who know me would call me straight because to their knowledge (and accurately), I have only been in relationships with men. Why then, do I identify more closely with the pansexual title (if I must have a label)? The answer is both simple and complex.

As another friend said in a related post, we're all a little more flexible than we care to admit. Though I have been with only men, I am attracted to souls, not genders. When I see a person, I see no gender , race , or other label . I see and feel what is on the inside of that person, that soul. That is the simple definition of pansexuality – as far as what it means to me.

But you see, there are so many variations of what each of these labels means to each individual person. That, and the fact that people are just people, is why labels suck. They really do. Can't we just treat each other like the precious individual human souls that we all are? Can't consenting adults simply love each other without everyone else butting in? But alas, people need definitions, so if there must be labels, now you have mine. I'm a pansexual. I love the human race. Pure and simple.

Think I would leave someone I'm into and go run off and fall in love with someone else, due to varying genders? Wrong. Think again. Did you not read the above clearly? I don't see genders. I see souls. Therefore, there's no reason to leave one for another based on genders. While I support various types of relationship roles, I'm not the type to leave for a reason like that. And there you have yet another problem with labels: judging . I know exactly who I love and who I am – and when I am in love, I am not afraid to say so.

I'll speak my mind clearly, no matter what. What about you?

*I originally published this on a since-closed venue.

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    Straight UP LGBTQ

    Lyn Lomasi is the main voice behind Straight Up LGBTQ. She's a pansexual woman on a mission to spread the upward message of equality through fun and seriousness. Whether you identify as straight, lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, transexual, pansexual, or otherwise, you deserve to be treated with the exact same respect as anyone. We're all just people, trying to make it on this difficult, but often fun, ride we call life.

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    Lyn Lomasi is founder and owner of the Brand Shamans network. She is your brand healing, soul healing, marketing & content superhero to the rescue! Running a network of websites, tackling deadlines single-handedly, and coaching fellow writers, brands, & entrepreneurs to be thought leaders is her top priority.

    While rescuing civilians from boring content and brands, this awesomely crazy family conquers the world, managing Intent-sive Nature while going on Upstream Parenting adventures & lessons, sometimes in an RV. They strive to cuddle with lions and giraffes. Until then, they settle for rescue dogs and cats.

    By supporting us, you support a single parent, healer,  and minority small business that donates to and/or stands for several causes, including homeless pets, homeless people, trans youth, equality, helping starving artists, and more! A portion of all proceeds from our all-inclusive store, Intent-sive Nature goes toward worthy causes.

    For guidance in the world of freelance writing or for advice on her specialty topics, Ask Lyn.

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